Back in the Game…

Morning SunI’m not going to bother with another “confessional”…argh!!

Yes, it’s been a LONG time and I’ve not been keeping up with the blog or my weight loss (GAIN!) journey! This is the beginning of a new day…

You all know me…if you’ve followed my journey at all, you know that I’ve vowed to keep it real with you.

The truth is that I have been busy/crazy/stressed, etc. I’ve not wanted to confess that I’ve not been taking care of myself or keeping up with healthy habits.

It’s been a rough few yrs that have seen job loss, moves, heartbreaks…BUT you know I’m not one to dwell! LOL

It’s a new day! Year, quarter, month….

Getting ready to do my April goals has inspired me to note that it is Q2 and I think one of the best things I could do this quarter is reconnect with my wonderful weight loss community – get honest and honor your wonderful friendships by asking for some accountability.

Hopefully, I can also inspires some of you along the way and we can REALLY know that this is life. You lose weight, make some mistakes and get right back in the game again.

I know that I’ve fallen back into some old patterns. So where do I go from here?

I REALLY want to learn and grow and not fret that it HAS to be a pattern in the future.

Awesome things are happening and I don’t want my weight/fitness level to stand in the way of anything.

SO, here’s to the first of many regular updates to come, including some new goals and check-ins. Also watch for some new 30 Day Challenges! YAY! Join me…let’s do it!

I appreciate you all more than you know!

P.S. Official weigh-in to come, BUT (gulp) getting real…I’m guessing the scale will show 215 lbs at least.  Onward…I refuse to gain back another pound and I KNOW getting a good 20 off will feel amazing!

Confession…I’ve gained weight!

WOW! ok, I know it has taken me awhile to write this…

Today I am inspired by someone on Twitter that I NEED to keep it real with you all!

This past year has seen me through A LOT of changes…not all of which I will go into here, but here are are few:

  • the loss of a job
  • moving from NC to parents house in MI
  • and most recently a move from MI to NM with sis who is starting a great new job here

This is NOT an excuse…I know that I have not made good choices a lot of the time. I did manage to keep up with exercise for a good deal of the time while in MI. (thanks to challenges and you all, those were some good times)

Man, what I can I say about my winter in MI – I think that’s really when the denial started. It’s easy to put on weight and not think about it as much when you are constantly in PJ’s or sweats working from home. πŸ˜‰ Yes, that was me!!

Bottom line and NOW to get serious! I have put on 40 lbs since my lowest weight of 158ish. GRRR Yes, that is right! I am now just shy of 200 lbs at 198.

I know why and how…I know the changes to be made AND I hope and pray that I am truly learning from this experience as I do NOT want to be someone that gains back 100+ lbs!!

Moving to Albuquerque has been such a wonderful surprise to me! If you read my blog, you know how much I fell in love with biking. Well, I am in bicycling heaven here! Trails galore and a climate to match!

Sis’s apartment has a great gym and pool! (Would you believe that ALL of the cardio machines have their own TV’s  AND we are choosing to NOT have TV in our apt here?!) I joke that I will be on the treadmill at night JUST to watch ridiculous TV! LOL

Whew…load off my chest – thanks for listening and the support!! YOU all rock! πŸ˜‰

P.S. I am thinking a new challenge is in order – probably will involve cardio goals that will be personal to all. Any takers? Stay tuned….

Today I am 40!

I am 40 today!

1 to 40: Hope for the future: Love

I'm turning 40 in 1 day!

loveI feel as if these posts about my future hopes would not be complete if I didn’t include one on the topic of love, my singleness and hopes for my future romantic life.

I can honestly say a few things about how I feel about finding love in my life:

  • At 278 lbs, 3 years ago, I did not feel hopeful. At times I felt lonely, depressed and as if no one would ever possibly be able to love me. I KNOW that this had everything to do with how I was feeling about myself.
  • Having lost 110 lbs now and turning 40, I can say that I do not feel this same hopelessness. I now feel better about myself. I feel that I have more of myself to give to a future mate and I am ready but not desperate to meet Mr. Right.
  • I do believe that God has a husband for me and I am trusting in His timing.
  • I do well being alone but I certainly do not wish to be single. I do want to share my life with someone.
  • On children: Of course with age, this is a topic to explore feelings about. I am grateful that I am not a 40 year old woman yearning to have children. On the other hand, I am open to the possibilities if my future husband A. has children of his own B. Really want us to “try” to have children of our own C. Adoption -  I do wonder sometimes if my many years as a nanny were actually my “mothering” years.

So there you have it…  πŸ˜‰


2 to 40: Hope for the future: A Mobile Lifestyle

2-to-40

globe1In this post, I would like to discuss another of my biggest hopes (intentions) for the future.

Up until this past Sept. I had been working for an online company for the past 4 years and was just getting ready to make the big move to a mobile lifestyle. (When I lost my job in Sept.)

What do I mean by this?

I spent a bit of time traveling in 2008-2009 and I discovered that it was really pretty easy to maintain my work schedule while abroad.

As I’ve said in some of my earlier posts, one of my biggest dreams has always been about traveling the world. Of course a big stumbling block to that has been the saving money/working situation.

Now that I have discovered the world of online business and virtual type work I no longer see money as the challenge it once was. In fact, there are SO many places that I could choose to live (that are high on my list as well) that are MUCH less expensive than the U.S.

So, one of my biggest goals in 2010 and as I enter my 40’s is to create a successful online business model for myself that will allow me to be able to maintain a mobile lifestyle with the ultimate goal of living anywhere that I would choose. (Italy, for example!) πŸ™‚

My current goal and location of choice is Thailand for the following reasons:

  • I have heard from others that a reasonable cost of living would be around $1000/mo U.S. which I think is a totally doable goal!
  • This is a part of the world that I have really wanted to explore (Southeast Asia)
  • I am imagining living somewhere with a great view and in walking distance of a beach

This could change in the upcoming months and I will keep you posted! If I get my income up quickly I could also see myself moving to Italy, Ireland or England! πŸ™‚


3 to 40: Hope for the future: Health

I'm turning 40 in 3 days!

healthylifeIn the next 3 posts leading up to the big day, I want to spend some time looking forward as to what my hopes for the future are.

There are many, but I will focus on the biggies!

Obviously, having lost 110 of my 140 lb goal is a one of those big hopes for my future.

I’ve known since starting out that it would be a journey, not something fast or necessarily easy at all.

I’ve come to know some truths about my struggle with weight even now after having lost so much. The reality is, like so many others, I will have to constantly keep this in the forefront of my mind. I need to be aware of the habits that I choose daily and remind myself of where I have come from in terms of my weight loss.

It’s not easy to maintain…this is something I have discovered already even though I haven’t quite reached my goal. I seem to put weight on pretty quickly when I deviate from the day-to-day healthy routine. I’ve discovered this just being in Las Vegas this past week. πŸ˜‰

I know that I will constantly need to maintain an exercise routine of some sort. I’m not anticipating being fanatical about this but I can imagine keeping with a routine that at minimum includes 4-5 days of cardio.

So, as I look ahead at my 40’s in regards to my health, here are my intentions:

  • to reach and maintain my goal weight of 138 lbs. (this is my initial goal right now and I can imagine that I may choose to go a bit lower with this)
  • to continue with healthy eating and calorie counting until I reach my goal weight
  • once I reach maintenance, I would like to think that I could manage somewhat of an 80/20 lifestyle when it comes to my food intake – meaning, if 80% of the time I am eating “normal”, healthy meals – the other 20% could be fine for occasional splurges
  • to continue with a regular exercise plan that includes cardio, strength training and core/stretching of some kind
  • to continue to push myself physically – biking, running, hiking, vacations that include physical activities
  • to continue to learn and grow emotionally and mentally as well – to keep my mind active and remain constant in my desire to learn new things
  • to feel just as great (or better!) at 50 as I do now at 40 WooHoo! πŸ™‚

I KNOW that I feel way better in regards to my health and weight turning 40 then I did on my 30th birthday! THIS is a great thing!!

4 to 40: Travel Adventures: Ireland

I'm turning 40 in 4 days!My most recent travel adventure led me to Ireland for the first time in Sept. 2008 I went to Dublin to meet up with a good friend and then we headed by car to tour a bit of the beautiful country.

blackwater-riverpaula-fishing-irelandpaula-countryside-irelandWe headed to the Blackwater River for some salmon fishing and we completely lucked out with gorgeous weather for most of our fishing adventure. P.S. We did not catch Salmon but we had a blast.

killarney-mcsweeneyskillarney2killarneyWe were then off to Killarney in County Kerry where we enjoyed an awesome B & B,  great food and fun pub life!

From Killarney, the famous Ring of Kerry was calling us and we were off by car to enjoy the beautiful scenery and drive. These were some of the most amazing views that I have ever seen.

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After County Kerry we decided to extend our trip (and my 10 day stay to 3.5 weeks) and we were off to Clifden in County Galway. We went there to explore another beautiful part of the country and happened upon the yearly music festival which was SO much fun! More fishing, dinners, pubs and great music!

old-castle-clifden-1clifden-dixie-micksclifden

This was an amazing trip!

P.S. I enjoyed my trip to Ireland (and my friend and his family so much) that I returned again in Dec. 2008 for 3.5 months! Yay! Would love to return again one day! πŸ™‚

5 to 40: Travel Adventures: Greece and Italy

I'm turning 40 in 5 days!More travel adventures…Yay!

At the end of the summer of 2001 my sister Michelle and I headed to England to meet up with youngest sis Janell who was attending summer courses in London.

We spent a few days with her there and then the 3 of us headed off to Greece for a night in Athens and a week in beautiful Santorini.

parthenon1parthenon2parthenon3

Of course the Pathenon was a must see in Athens:

…before we boarded the overnight boat for Santorini.

This was one of the best vacations and I loved this week with my sisters. We rented a small car and explored the island enjoying Greek food, beaches, a volcano hike, amazing views and more!

santorini1santorini-beachsantorini2

We then headed to Venice (my second trip here) for a few days before
we parted ways. My sisters headed back to the US and I was on to
what remains one of my favorite places thus far…Cinque Terre Italy.

I met an English friend and her daughter here and we had an amazing time.

Cinque Terre is made up of 5 villages along the Italian coast. People come here to hike the beautiful land and enjoy the pristine beached. I did a bit of both along with some wonderful meals, wine and the company of a dear friend.

cinque-terre1cinque-terre-beach

I am happy to say that although my friend was unable to join me and I was not really in shape at the time, I did do all of the hikes between the villages on my own.

cinque-terre2cinque-terre3cinque-terre4cinque-terre5

I would say that one of my dreams would be to live in Italy for a period one day. I love the culture, people and places.

6 to 40: Travel Adventures: Puerto Vallarta

I'm turning 40 in 6 days!Since travel is such a BIG desire of mine and a BIG goal for 2010 (to have a completely mobile lifestyle) I thought I would write a few posts highlighting some more of my favorite trips throughout the years.

I rented an amazing Puerto Vallarta condo one year from a guy I located online. That year I actually had such a great time that I went twice – once with a good friend and the other time with two of my sisters.

Here’s are some great pics from the balcony of the condo:

pv-view1pv-view2pv-view-sunset

I loved this vacation SO much. It was all about great food and relaxing days at the beach sipping fruity drinks.

And check out these awesome pic!

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Mexico! What’s not to like! πŸ™‚


7 to 40: Looking Ahead at 2010

I'm turning 40 in 7 days!

happy-new-yearHappy New Year! πŸ™‚

I cannot believe that it is the final day of 2009 today! What a year it has been.
A quick review of my 2009:

  • Last year at this time I was in Dublin celebrating New Year’s with a great friend and ended up staying in Ireland for 3.5 months. It was the 2nd of two trips and I had an awesome time. I would definitely like to return one day soon.
  • At this time last year, my weight loss was at an all time low of 158 lbs. I am actually 10 lbs up from that as I head into 2010 BUT I am trying not to be too bummed about this as I contemplate the possible reasons. πŸ˜‰ I think it is a positive thing that I am feeling so much better about myself that the remaining lbs have not been as urgent to get off. I traveled and have done so much physically this past year that I had never been able to do comfortably. This is an accomplishment and I am choosing to feel great about it! πŸ˜‰ I do plan to reach my ideal weight in 2010.
  • I returned to San Francisco for a wonderful visit with my friends and their newest addition to the family. I attended Hosanna Celebration Center and was able to worship with the team that I love so much.
  • During the trip to San Francisco, I unexpectedly lost my online job of 4+ years.
  • I moved from NC to MI for the winter (I did have this planned prior to losing my job AND this totally ended up being a huge blessing.)

I will be officially writing my goals shortly, (Since my birthday is Jan 7, I like to give myself a week’s grace period) but here are a few of my big intentions/goals for 2010:

  • to increase my income to a point where I am able to live a mobile lifestyle. Current plan would be to start out in Thailand. Yay!
  • to reach my ultimate weight loss goal – I will be reviewing this but should be roughly 20-30 lbs yet to lose.
  • and more but those would be the biggies!

I wish you all the very happiest of New Year’s and much success in 2010!

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